I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize