"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
We left an ass print on the piano.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
