Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
