I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
