Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
