office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
