I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
