Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
