I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
