For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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