She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
