Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
