I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
