I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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