turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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