You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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