Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
