just come out here and I will go home with you...
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
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