Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Can I color on your dick again?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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