sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
