she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Randomize
