he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
