Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
