i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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