that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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