I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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