Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize