grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
