My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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