Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I just found a bag of teeth...
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize