Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
