i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
