i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
