I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
