I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize