so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
