there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
