I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
