My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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