he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
