I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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