shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize
