He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
