I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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