Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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