Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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