Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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