yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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