My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
babies were throwing up all over the place
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
