shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
